Pa

12 days since Pa's collapse in Ji Chek's house.

He had wanted to visit Ji Chek after his knee replacement operation. When Pa and Ma arrived in Penang on 29 May 2015, Friday, Pa was hale and hearty, and walked so fast that Marsini had to ask him to slow down. He had also enjoyed thoroughly the ayam percik Ma brought. As usual, he was often outside the house for a puff. Later, they found him on the floor at the dining area. He was brought to Adventist Hospital, and drifted into a deep slumber. He hardly roused from his sleep, even when we called him. In His mercy, God did not let him suffer. There was an imperceptible squeeze of his fingers when I called him. Most noticeable was his sudden response two days later , when I called him via face time with Sean. I take it as his acknowledgement of his daughter's plea for it.

Kor arrived on Thursday. She spent 2 hours talking to him, and he accepted Christ by mouthing the words, repeating after Kor. She told him to release everything and follow Christ. Tears flowed from his eyes, and he gave his last breath at 1.40 pm with Sean and Luan by his side.

Things happened very fast then. They bought him new clothes to wear, and they followed him back to KL in the hearse. On his last journey back, they passed the apartment where they made a turn, upon Sean's request.

Upon his arrival that night at Nirvana Memorial, Sungai Besi, we were waiting for him. The wake was held the next evening, where Isaac and Khong gave eulogies. The funeral was on Sunday 2pm and he was cremated around 4pm. Yesterday, we collected his ashes, where it was laid to rest facing the trees, with the sound of birds chirping in the trees and Christian music played in background. Ironically, at home, in the morning, a black and white bird with a fantail came near the kitchen window, chirping at me for a few minutes. How I want to believe it is Pa, giving me his final farewell. Pa, rest in peace.....

You have given me life and my health. Without fail, you would make sure we bathed by 5pm, put on jackets, often despite our complaints. You encouraged us to study hard, saying boys and girls are endowed with the same capabilities. Yes, life had been harsh on you, and it had taken a toll on your own marital happiness, but you did all you could to keep us together. You walked me to the Football Association to study when I complained of the noise at home. Typical of your kind heart, you had given shelter to so many of my cousins, uncles and aunts, checking on their education. During your funeral, all had shed tears and remembered your contribution to them.

Because of you, I had forged my way to university, the same way Khong, Sean and Luan did. Tua ci took the longer, arduous way, but you had always been so proud of her achievements in the bank. You had stood you by her decision to be a Christian, the same way you gave full support to all of our choices in life.

Despite my own misgivings about getting married, I had received your letter and obeyed your advice. You were there every step of the way during my wedding, and had taken care of me when I gave birth to Lin, your first grandchild. You had taken care of me during confinement, making sure every part of me was warm, and I did not touch cold water at all. Pa, today I don't have a single body ache because of your care, and I can't thank you enough for it.

Pa, life is full of ups and downs, but because of your love and pride in us, today, all of us are strong and united. You are right that money can be a problem, but education will always be our mainstay. It is also because of your belief in education that I have always worked so hard. Pa, you have given us so much shelter that I often took you for granted. Today, I realize I have no one to celebrate Father's Day, and again I wallowed in self-pity. However, I remembered your last words that it is not worth it to regret because you are already at a far away place and will never come back.

Pa, all of us know you are at a beautiful place and at peace with yourself too. We, your children and grandchildren will continue to work hard in your legacy. We will take great care of Ma, love of your life and never let her be in want of anything. Pa, rest in peace. We love you.